Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life
As a human being, I can attest to the bitter truth that I am indeed flawed. Thankfully, we all are (haha you’re flawed) and sometimes that’s what makes life so interesting. In other cases, we find negative thoughts that ruminate in our heads and keep us from enjoying the best of life, finding ourselves in situations hard to relax and breathe in. Does this sound like you? Welcome to planet earth baby where due to the wiring of our brain for survival we are constantly looking for the negative in any situation, and it takes four good things to counter 1 bad. The good news is we don’t live like that anymore, but if you are still throwing rocks at anything that moves I am a bit envious. Anyways, I am here to answer your needs. There are changes you can make to better yourself in the long run that I have found to work, and I am here to share with you one solution I have found to improving my mindset that has helped me to improve my life.
Like many, I have had my own mental health challenges that I have been through, and that have left me with a long list of embarrassing moments to think about for the rest of my life. I have been in and out of counseling and can say that it has equipped me to find solutions that have helped me to deal with different situations through the power of thinking. In addition, as a marketing graduate at university I have learned the power of changing the narrative and how it can help us cultivate a better life. Often in life we find ourselves stuck in the same situations and mentalities over and over again, struggling to look for a way out. The reason is simple. We are looking at the world through a perspective that could benefit from a point in the right direction. When we find ourselves having thoughts that we wish we didn’t, or in a self-defeating narrative it is time to do the work, and i'm here to teach you what you need to know in 4 steps.
Change your thoughts, Change your life.
1. Become more aware of your thinking
a. The first step is to become more aware of your thinking. Pay attention to how you are thinking and try to make connections towards what made you think what you did. This is an important step because once you realize what is making you think that way, you can address the problem at hand whether it’s a situation that is not ideal for you, or your own reaction to a situation that can be changed. Often we find that there is things we can change, and things we cannot. Do not fret, because when we cannot change a situation we can still change how we think about it. It is important to note during this step that our thoughts aren’t always the truth. We are human, we are flawed, but we can also make improvements to our mind and use it as a tool that helps us to overcome obstacles and work towards a more happy and meaningful life.
b. What am I thinking? - Spendjamin’s.. interesting name a clever mix of Benjamin and Spend, since Benjamin’s are often referred to as money.
2. Target & Address necessary changes
a. Once you are aware of your own thinking, you will often find that there is a lot of good inside of you and things that do not need to be changed. The importance of realizing what changes your attitude and thinking patterns is beneficial in this step because it allows you to target the things that need the most work. When you find yourself thinking something that isn’t ideal, this is the time for you to note down what made you think this and why it isn’t beneficial to you. Depending on the situation, you may or may not be able to take a step back and address the problem in that moment. While I find the best time to address it for myself is in that moment, it is often hard in social situations. In this case, I will take a mental note and plan to address it before bed.
b. I think this is a cool and creative username, but I am afraid it will imply to others that I am rich and better than them even though this is not true.
3. Changing the thought
a. Finally, you’ve made it this far. Once you have become more aware of your thinking and can pinpoint what you want to work on, you are ready to change your thoughts. Through my time in counseling I have learned the best way to do this is to put in a related, but better thought into your head when you are having unwanted thoughts. This is a hard process, your brain is going to want to cling to what it already knows and what you have been thinking for some time, but in order to change it you have to repeat the better thought.
b. Being myself may make others misunderstand me, But it may also help me find people who think similar to myself.
4. Rinse & Repeat
a. Your mind is going to want to believe what is familiar to it, but that doesn’t mean you can’t make a change. It’s going to take some time and it is hard-work but the more you do it the easier it will get. As you continue to repeat the new thought your mind will become more comfortable and it will become more important than the thought that you do not like. In addition to repeating the thought with a better perspective, you can also introduce evidence or more similar thoughts that hold up your initial argument.
b. I am worth taking a risk to find my tribe. Others that do not like this have the power to change their reaction towards my online username.
References