WHY YOUR SPOUSE /BAE DOESN’T LIKE YOUR FRIENDS!

This article gives several reasons why your significant other may not like your friends.

WHY YOUR SPOUSE OR BAE DOESN’T LIKE YOUR FRIENDS!
 
This article gives several reasons why your significant other may not like your friends. Being in a healthy relationship isn’t always easy and sometimes our relationships can influence how we treat and interact with our friends. Sometimes our friends and significant others look at as us completely different and we may struggle with trying to balance. Depending on the length of the relationships, it is possible for the conflict to occur. This can be a challenging obstacle to overcome however before making any rash decisions, it is important to weigh out the pros and cons of both relationships. 
 
1. Jealous of the free time you spend with friends
One primary reason that your significant other may not like your friends is if you are spending too much time with them. Although we may enjoy certain activities with our friends that we don’t enjoy with our significant other (shopping, golfing, sporting events), continually doing these events with friends instead of your significant other may cause them to get jealous. Keep in mind you actually participating in these activities may be harmless, but if your partner is insecure about what’s really going on, it may cause them to act suspicious. Friends can be a priority in our lives however, it is normal for a partner to sometimes feel jealous. If you come across this problem, try finding group activities where you can all hang out. 
 
 
2. Thinks your friends are a bad influence; birds of a feather
Another reason that is very common for your partner to not like your friends is if they think your friend(s) is a bad influence on you. If every time you and the gang get together you end up wasted and/or making bad decisions, your partner will eventually get fed up. Also, if your partner knows that your friend engages/encourages drug use, they may look down on that. This may be coming from the heart and your partner could honestly be concerned. On the other hand, this could just be a manipulative tactic to keep you from seeing that friend, leading to you having more time for them. 
 
3. Your significant other has trust issues
Unfortunately, one of the hardest traits to deal with in a relationship is insecurity. If your partner dated someone before who lied and/or cheated on them, they may always be insecure about what you are doing. It is possible for people of the opposite sex to be friends, however, if they’re self-conscious it won’t matter if that friend is like a sibling to you, in the back of their mind you could be cheating so they might not want you hanging out with them alone. The problem with this is it may be hard for your partner to admit that they have trust issues. In order for the relationship to succeed it will take communication, patience, and understanding.
 
 
4. Your friends are annoying or kill the mood 
Your honey may not like your friends simply because they find them annoying. It could be something as simple as gossiping or how they talk to people in public i.e. waiters or cashiers. You may not notice it, but you could also act differently around your friends or maybe aren’t as affectionate around others. PDA (public displays of affection) is essential for some people in relationships and if your partner feels that you switch it up around your friends, they are not going to want to be around them. 
 
5. Your friend is annoying and unattractive 
Unfortunately, pretty privilege is a thing. Attractive people get away with crimes and things that are morally wrong all the time. Along with that, some people are naturally nicer to people who are attractive. If your lover is rude to a certain friend but is extremely accommodating to another it could be based on how attracted they are to said friend. 
 
 
6. Your partner thinks your friend is hot and can’t handle it 
Another reason your significant may not want to hang around your friends is if they are themselves attracted to them. It is normal for someone to find someone else’s partner attractive, however, some people cannot handle themselves and feel awkward when they can’t handle their attraction. Instead of telling you the truth about your friend being hot, they probably rather spare your feelings and make up a bogus reason why they don’t like your friend. 
 
 
7. Friends don’t like him/her either 
Another reason your significant other may not like your friends is if they already don’t like them.  Whether it’s because you and your partner have struggled with cheating or respecting each other, if you and your partner have had hardships and your friends know about it, they may be hesitant on trusting them again. This may take some time for them to be cool again so during this time, it is normal for your partner to feel some animosity towards your friend group. 
 
8. Your significant other is possessive 
The last reason your significant other may not like your friends is if they are possessive. The main sign that your significant other is possessive is if they display a fear of losing you or that they wouldn’t be able to handle losing you. At some point, you have to look within the relationship and ask, “are you an object to own or someone who brings value into their life?”. Another sign that your significant other is possessive is if they display signs of jealousy and if they have low self-esteem. 
 
Wrap Up
It may be hard to digest realizing that your partner doesn’t like your friends however it doesn’t have to be turmoil. Try finding activities or events that they have in common and it could possibly build a bridge between the two. If you feel that your partner and friends can’t get along and never will, it is best to keep them separate and avoid unnecessary drama. 
 
 
 
 

Media Critic & CMU Alumna

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