Your Entire Facebook Is Now A Free Professional Photography Studio

There is now a tiny purple sparkle icon on literally every photo in the Facebook app (yours, your friends’, your ex’s, that cringe 2009 album, everything).

Tap it → choose one of five moods → wait six seconds → receive a portrait that looks like you hired a $5,000 photographer who also happens to be a master retoucher.

No payment. No signup. No limit.

The five moods that are currently destroying careers (in a good way)
Executive 2026 Navy/charcoal suit, perfect Rembrandt light, blurred C-suite office. Looks like you’re about to close an eight-figure round.
Founder (post-seed, pre-egress) Golden-hour window light, cashmere crew-neck or open-collar shirt, plants, MacBook barely visible. The exact vibe that raises money on sight.
Editorial Single overhead beauty dish, faint colored rim, film grain, medium-format shallowness. Your face, but shot by Greg Williams or Pamela Hanson.
Clean Creator White or light-gray seamless, soft wrap-around light, subtle smile. Perfect for YouTube thumbnails and course sales pages.
Approachable Professional Warm three-quarter light, genuine eye-smile, solid-color sweater. Real-estate agents and therapists are spamming this one right now.
Bonus text commands (type after tapping the sparkle)
same style all photos
minus 5 years natural
different outfits
smiling version
black and white
background: tokyo rooftop dusk
Tested on real garbage this morning
2015 club photo, red cups, direct flash → “Executive 2026” → now my new consulting website hero
2020 lockdown webcam screenshot → “Founder” → instantly the photo I’m using for my next pitch deck
2011 beach vacation, sunburnt, wearing sunglasses → “Editorial” → looks like a Vogue outtake
All saved in full 4K, no watermark, straight to camera roll.

Current (tiny) flaws
Hands in frame = occasional mutant finger
Very intricate jewelry can simplify
Extreme low-light originals sometimes keep a hint of grain
That’s it. For 98 % of normal use, you will never notice.

The silent revolution happening right now
Entire real-estate brokerages Professional AI photoshoot app are batch-processing fifteen years of listing photos
Divorce lawyers are quietly upgrading their “About” pages
Seed-round founders are replacing grainy iPhone selfies with studio perfection before demos
Your aunt just turned her 2007 flip-phone pics into senior-dating-profile gold
No one is posting “I used AI” because the results don’t look like AI anymore.

Open Facebook. Scroll to the worst photo of yourself that still exists. Tap the purple sparkle. Pick a mood.

Six seconds later you will understand why professional photographers stopped getting Christmas bookings.

Your past just got a free glow-up.