Coping With Post-Cancer Anxiety
First and foremost I'd like to say dealing with the after-effects cancer is a different experience for everyone. It depends on the age, sex, or circumstance of an individual. Before getting to the tips that can help cope with post-remission here's a brief backstory of my personal experience with having cancer:
As a single young adult, I had just accepted a job in another city and was ready to do some house searching. Life had another plan. The weekend I was supposed to look at an apartment, I received the disturbing call that cancer was found from a biopsy and blood test. Stage 2 Hodgkins Lymphoma. Ok, so after chemo and radiation the plan was to go ahead with my goal relocating. Not quite. During my second round of Chemo in March the Covid-19 pandemic hit hard in my community. Everything was happening so fast it was surreal. Fast forward a few months later to when I finally finished my treatment! The CT scans and PET scans read clear! What happened next I was already prepared for: "Are you still moving to another city?"
Like previously stated, post-remission effects everyone differently. In my case, the effects were, and still are, traumatic. I get it, I should be happy I survived. Regardless of how much weight was gained and the hair that was lost, I was alive. I get it. However, I have always been the "live in the moment" person. Not anymore! I cannot explain the anxiety it has caused, always wondering the what ifs. Will the cancer come back? Should I stay close to my doctors and forget moving? I had two options: Talk to someone who was also in remission or seek professional help. With no hesitation I sought out professional help. I'm not one to drop problems on a friend because i do not want them to worry. I would rather tell them to a stranger. I was nervous that the first therapist I was given wouldn't be the right "stranger" though. Emotionally I had no time to try one session after another with different therapists. I needed help quick! Thankfully, my first session with the first therapist was....good. She helped me realize that I was going through a grieving stage. Finally something made sense. She was right. I had lost so much within a few months and it hurt. I honeslty did not know how to move on in life. No more chemo, weekly doctor visits, texts or calls...now what? I felt stuck and I wanted everyone else to be stuck with me. In regard to that, the first thing I acknowledged with the therapist was I had problem seeing everyone happy on social media. I was guided to limit my use on Facebook and Instagram. I went further, I deleted those apps without hesitation. For a month I was social media free. The result? Contentment. There was more time to focus on my healing process. I started doing the hobbies I enjoyed before. Projects were finally finished! I didnt isolate myself, but did zoom calls and movie night with friends. There was more time for exercise and i lost weight from all the effects from chemo medications. After a month I decided to log back into social media. Posts about relationships, new homes, and etc didnt bother me anymore. Point in case: delete your social media my post-remission friends! You will lose the anxiety from comparing your life to others, making you feel stuck.
Anxiety of the cancer coming back, recurrence, is detrimental. We do not know what the next day brings. Therefore, live in the moment the BEST you can. I have to constantly remind myself of that every single day. I am determined to remind my self until it becomes easier to do so.
An article written by NCI-Designated Cancer Centers staff concluded that surviving cancer helps an individual develop new strategies to manage challenges. I try to remind myself of this fact everytime its scan day. If my cancer were to come back, I know I will be able to handle it. I will probably handle it a bit better than the first time because I'd know what to expect!
Acknowledging the fact that anxiety will not go away is a must. This helps me to be a realistic. Anxieties are there, and thats ok. You can and will cope with it!
It hasn't been a while year since I've been in remission so coping with the anxiety is a gradual process. Looking for multiple ways to cope is definitely a must. Therefore, I have only listed a couple, but I do know they worked for me hence the sharing. Hoping the best for those who are still overcoming their battle with cancer and post-effects!