How To Spot Fake Friends And Find True Friends

Feeling as if you are surrounded by fake friends? It's time to find real ones that'll stick by you for a lifetime.

Do you feel as if you are surrounded by fake friends? Are they constantly putting you down; making you feel bad about yourself? Do they secretly talk about you behind your back? Those are a few signs of fake friends. 

You would think that fake friendships would end in high school, but even in the adult world, there are still fake people. Fake friends seem to be everywhere; however, this doesn't have to be the case. If you choose your friends wisely, this is unlikely to happen. 

As someone that has dealt with the betrayal of fake friends, I've put together this article to help those that are struggling with spotting fake friends. 

Here is how you can spot fake friends and find true ones:

1. Fake Friends Talk About You Behind Your Back 

If you noticed your friends gossiping about you behind your back, watch out! That is a sign of a fake friend. Whether they are throwing subs about you online, spreading rumors, or telling others about your personal business, those friends aren't loyal or worthy to you. These so-called friends are probably doing the same thing to their other "friends." 

To find true friends, you'll need to associate yourself with people you can trust. True friends aren't likely to shout at your personal business and spread false information about you. They aren't likely to talk behind your back either. 

If you spotted your friends talking poorly about you without your knowledge, get rid of them. They're most likely doing the same to others. 

fake friends talk about you behind your back
Image Source: A Conscious Rethink

2. Fake Friends Hold Grudges Against You

Let's admit, many friendships have downfalls from time to time. Downfalls within friendships are normal. However, if you noticed that after a mishap, your friends decided to hold a grudge and decided to no longer talk to you, those friends were fake to you from the beginning. 

If you want to find true friends, find friends that aren't willing to hold grudges against you. True friends would want things to work out when things go wrong; they aren't likely to hold grudges and remove themselves from your life. They will forgive easily, would want to make things work, and look past your disagreements. 

fake friends hold grudges against you
Image Source: FreePik

3. Two-Faced Friends Don't Accept Who You Are 

Do your friends make cruel comments about your looks? Do they make harsh statements about who you are as a person? Fake friends will try to change everything about who you are. If they don't state it upfront, you can tell from the way they treat you. They'll do so by making odd looks, weird gestures, or drop little hints about how they're feeling. Instead of accepting you for who you are, they'll try to change you into what they want you to be. 

If you want to find true friends, look for ones that are acceptant of who you are.  True friends love you for being you; no matter what your lifestyle may be. They accept your flaws, your personality, and everything in between. 

They'll want to be around you for being you, not for something you are not. 

4. Fake Friends Treat You Differently Around Others 

Do your friends act differently when someone else comes around? Are you suddenly their target to pick on? When fake friends hang around others, they start to treat you differently. They would do things to try and impress others they're hanging around with to embarrass you. It's time to cut those friends off. 

Look for true friends that will treat you the same when they are around others. Whether you're alone or with a crowd of different people, real friends won't act differently. Their views of you won't change just because someone new comes along. 

5. Untrue Friends Don't Listen Or Care About Your Problems 

After expressing your feelings and concerns to your friends, how do they react? Do they brush off your feelings?  Do they seem distracted while you're talking to them? Or are they taking the time to listen and respect your feelings?

Fake friends invalidate your feelings. They don't care about your concerns or what's going on in your personal life. They only talk about their feelings and their problems. They don't care to listen to yours. Why be friends with someone that isn't willing to listen or care about your issues in life? 

Search for true friends that are willing to offer solutions to your problems. They will listen to what you have to say because your feelings are important to them.  

6. Fake Friends Are Always Asking You For Favors 

Doing favors for your friends is a great way to show that you are always there for them. Sometimes, asking for too many favors can result in your friends taking advantage of you. Therefore, fake friends only contact you when they want something from you. 

For instance, if your friends suddenly appear out of the blue when money is involved, that is a sign of a fake friend. If they are constantly asking for favors, but make excuses in return, don't waste your time on those so-called friends. 

On the other hand, true friends understand give and take. They're willing to compromise when favors are involved. Your friendship is equal when it involves doing things for each other. 

asking for too many favors signs of fake friends
Image Source: FreePik

7. They Disappear When You Need Them The Most

Do your friends suddenly disappear out of thin air when you need their help? Fake friends aren't present when you need them the most. They are either busy or they come up with excuses; so they aren't always available. 

Although fake friends behave this way, true friends will always be there for you. When you're experiencing your darkest moments, you can pick up the phone and rely on them to talk to you. Wherever you may be, they will assist you.

Sometimes our true friends aren't always available, but they will always find time to make it up to you. 

8. Fake Friends Bring Down Your Accomplishments 

Were you ever excited about landing a new job? Or getting a promotion? When you share your accomplishments with your friends, how do they react? 

When friends are fake, instead of complimenting you for your hard work and your accomplishments, fake friends will show signs of jealousy. They will play it off as if they are happy for you; beware, they are not. 

With that being said, if you want true friends, they would never feel jealous of you succeeding. They would want to celebrate your achievements along with you. They'll make you feel proud of yourself and want to be part of your accomplishments.

fake friends tear down accomplishments
Image Source: FreePik

To wrap things up, having friends that love and appreciate you for who you are is a wonderful thing. Real friends can last a lifetime; fake friends come and go.

If you were able to relate to any of these fake friend behaviors, get rid of them for good! If you are a fake friend yourself, try to improve on your behaviors to become a better friend.

Hey, ya'll! Check out my cool stuff! XOXO

No Saves yet. Share it with your friends.

Write Your Diary

Get Free Access To Our Publishing Resources

Independent creators, thought-leaders, experts and individuals with unique perspectives use our free publishing tools to express themselves and create new ideas.

Start Writing