8 Significant Signs You Might Be Non-binary

Gender is a weird and confusing thing that not all of us can relate to. Many people identify as non binary, neither male nor female, but how do you know if you're non-binary or not?

To put it very simply, if you are looking at this with genuine curiosity, then you most likely are non-binary. The fact that you're questioning it is a very good sign that you are. Now, just because I've said this doesn't mean you have to agree. Gender is entirely up to you. It is your decision; it is how you feel.

However, because you are looking this question up, it means that you are not sure, so I will try to help you. I've been where you are before; I've even looked it up myself when I was questioning. Because I know what you're going through, I will tell you how I came about knowing that I was non-binary. 

How I Knew I Was Non-binary

I wasn't necessarily a tomboy growing up, but I wasn't a very girly girl either. This didn't mean much to me when I was little because I didn't know that gender was a fluid thing; I didn't know there were more than two genders. 

It was the beginning of my sophomore year in high school when I started questioning. I'd cut my hair short, and that's when I started feeling...different. I asked my sister, who had also cut her hair short before me - if she had started questioning her gender after cutting her hair. When she said "no," I realized that there might be something there. It took me a few months to conclude that nonbinary was the proper identification for me. I thought at first that I was maybe gender fluid, but I didn't feel like a boy or a girl ever. 

It doesn't matter when you start questioning, I didn't start until high school, but maybe you're a bit younger or a bit older. That's completely fine. You are still valid. Gender is a weird thing, and sometimes you don't realize that until later in life. 

There is no right or wrong with gender; it's a very fluid thing. I want to start by saying that if you decide you are nonbinary, that's great! Good for you. If you feel that nonbinary is not the correct identity for you in a year or so, then that is entirely ok. If you change your mind or realize that something's not right, there is nothing wrong with that. 

I often find myself asking if I'm faking it or not. Am I faking it for attention? Am I just trying to be cool and different? If you're asking this question, I can almost 100% assure you that you are not faking it. 

Now, let's get to it.

Here are 8 signs that can help you determine if you are non-binary. 

Here are 8 signs that can help you determine if you are nonbinary. 
Image source: verywellmind

1. You're Questioning your gender

Like I said before, if you are questioning your gender, it is a very good sign that you might be nonbinary (or whatever other gender you may be questioning you are). The fact that you're questioning your gender is a sign that you might be nonbinary because it proves that there's something there. If you were just cisgender (being the gender you were assigned at birth), you wouldn't be having these thoughts in the first place. 

2. You Feel More Comfortable Dressing Androgynous

Dressing androgynous means dressing gender-neutral, not feminine or masculine. If you feel more comfortable when you dress like this, then you might be nonbinary. Dressing androgynous may give you that feeling of no gender, and that's what being nonbinary is all about; no gender, just you. 

3. You Don't Feel Comfortable Using he/him or she/her Pronouns

You've been used to being called she/her or he/him for your whole life, but is it now becoming uncomfortable for you? When others use these pronouns when referring to you, do you cringe and become uncomfortable? I realized this when I was first figuring out for myself whether or not I was nonbinary. I felt a lot more comfortable when people used they/them when referring to me. I first told this to my best friend, who started using those pronouns for me, and that's when it hit me that those pronouns were definitely for me. 

This is a good sign that you might be nonbinary because pronouns are a significant indicator of who you are. If you are comfortable using she/her or he/him pronouns, but also they/them pronouns as well, you may still be nonbinary. 

4. You Don't Identify as Your Birth Sex

If you don't feel comfortable living as the gender you were assigned at birth; this is another good sign that you might be nonbinary. Living as the gender that you were assigned at birth is called being cisgender, but if you don't feel this way, then you are most likely genderqueer in some way (whether that be transgender, gender fluid, nonbinary, etc.).

5. You Feel a Connection With Non-binary Artists

Artists like Sam Smith, Ezra Miller, and Demo Lovato have all come out as nonbinary or genderqueer. If you really look up to someone who is nonbinary and you feel a connection with them then that might be a sign you are nonbinary. 

6. You Don't Quite Feel Like You're Transgender but You Don't Quite Feel Like You're Cisgender Either

You may have a slight feeling that you may be transgender, but this could also be a part of you that tells you otherwise. This is ok. If you feel in between genders then you may be genderqueer whether that be genderfluid or nonbinary or something else. 

7. You Genuinely Want to Be 

If you want to be nonbinary, then you can be nonbinary. Simply wanting to be nonbinary is quite a significant sign that you might be. If you genuinely feel and want to be nonbinary, then you are; end of the story. 

8. You're Reading This Article

Like I said at the beginning of this article, if you're here reading this with genuine curiosity then that is a good sign you are nonbinary. 

If you don't relate to any of these signs, that doesn't mean you aren't nonbinary. There are many different signifiers and feelings that can prove that you may be nonbinary; this list is not the final list, but a few good suggestions for you. 

Also, if you decide that you want to identify as nonbinary, but you don't want to change the way you dress or the way you look, that is completely ok. Your look doesn't make you nonbinary; it's you who makes you nonbinary. It's an identity and not a physical appearance. If you have long hair and look generally female but identify as nonbinary, then you are nonbinary. This is the same for if you look masculine. It doesn't matter how you look; if you identify as nonbinary, as I said, you are nonbinary. 

Gender is all up to you. You are the only person that can dictate how you identify.

Nonbinary creative writer who wants to change the world.

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